SUPPLICATION

“Give ear to my words and consider my plea. Listen to my cry for help, as I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation. Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain. I beseech you to respond to this offering which I make to you, that I may be freed from all dangers of soul and body. How many are my foes! How many rise up against me! Arise, and deliver me! Strike all my enemies on the jaw; break the teeth of the wicked! I beg both for myself and for my relations and benefactors, friends and enemies, pardon for our sins, and the grace of perseverance in good, whereby we may save our souls. Give us relief from our distress; be merciful to us and hear my prayer. Obtain for us peace of heart; assist us in all our actions; succor us promptly in all our spiritual and temporal needs; console and defend us in our dangers. I ask for peace between nations, for humane rulers, and for tranquility among peoples; and grant that we may one day all rejoice together in paradise.”

“I’m sorry sir,” said the large woman behind the counter, “but you lack the proper documentation. You need three forms of valid identification. You need to have these notarized and you need to fill these out in triplicate. Be sure to sign in all the appropriate places and you need to acquire the additional validating signatures. Come by again next week and we’ll see where you’re at. NEXT!”